Life actually -- “Confuses”!! And confusion is the spice…

Milke bhi hum naa mile tumse na jaane kyon…. Anjane hein silsile tumse na jaane kyon…
Sapne hein palkon tale tumse na jaane kyon…
Tu jaane naa… tu jaane naa…
(pls sing while reading it)



Well before you start thinking this means something then let me clarify – some1 dedicated this song to me (mind u, singing along with it) and this song reminds me of that “friend”.. I wrote this piece for my own reference but m posting it here cos it seems worth the space!

I’ve always treasured the presence of each and every person in my life. I might not be in touch with few but still at some point in time I got to learn something from each one – be it the good or bad thing in life. The good ones I incorporated and I became aware of the bad ones and stayed away from it. It helped me grow. I won’t comment on whether it made me a good person or no but it definitely put me on the path of being better each day, each moment.

Some made me realize how friends become family, some taught me the value of moments spent together, some opened my eyes to realities, some made me laugh and some made me cry. But each one made me feel special in their own small ways – by calling out of the blue, by making me smile when I was low, by saying all nice things about me (well who does not like that), by giving me surprises, by saying how much I mean to them and endless other things. My heart really smiles when I think of each one. That’s why when one person does anything bad I just remember how much good my each friend has done for me.

Coming back to the friend who dedicated the song. I can’t forget moments where I smiled endlessly – the singing of songs (with weird expressions!), the surprises (special ones), Bhojpuri mein baatein, hindi poems (like 2nd std kid), singing songs upon my coaxing, making extra efforts, laughing aloud even when I passed a comment, never feeling offended, saying things honestly n saying things outright even knowing that I may form an opinion, introducing me to long-island-ice-tea and drinking my most ‘kadvi’ drink happily, calling when it rained, messaging when I threatened for a reply, teasing me and then agreeing to it too, fighting and then forgetting…. All of that and much more happened.

But sometimes life confuses us. Situations reverse. Friends go away. Life still goes on amidst thoughts – some happy, some sad, some hopeful while some filled with anger. People can choose to go away at their own will. Maybe I also move away from people’s lives. But what nobody has a control over is the memories (my memory might not be ‘razor sharp’ but it’s not that bad also). So I choose not to feel sad over what’s out of life but I choose to feel happy about what’s mine and no one can dare take it away, i.e. my little (ok maybe big) memory scrapbook. Some images in black n white, some in colour, some bright, some dull, few good, few bad but all mine.

So I wait here for some more people to enter my life cos it’s a very healthy process. And I wish to fill my scrapbook even more so that years down the line I don’t regret about ‘not’ making an effort. I certainly hope to find some1 special for whom I can open my book and share the journey.

PS: I re read this one, it comes across as a confused spray of words. But it’s the flow I had. So I’l not edit it. I’ll just let it ‘be’. Cos this one’s straight from the heart.